A Woman In Grey*

First of all, go read this interview. Secondly, Jessica Day George rocks. Even if I didn't love her books, which I do, I would buy them. Just to support her literary view of women. I approve big time.

The interviewer gets JDG to talk about what she doesn't like about how women are sometimes portrayed in literature. This is my favorite passage:

JDG: When the girl does save the day, but does so by, essentially, becoming a man. (William Shakespeare, she’s talking to you!) Dressing as a man, short hair, ultra-butch, sometimes even having to conceal her identity and live as a man completely, in order to earn the right to fight her own battles. No. NoNoNoNoNo! There is no reason why a girl who also enjoys high fashion cannot pick up the candlestick and knock the evil wizard unconscious. There is no reason why a woman cannot be a military strategist and still knit as a hobby, or have kids, or enjoy riding off into the sunset with a tall handsome guy on a white horse when the battle is won. So I write my heroines the way I like to think I am: smart, funny, tough, and well-dressed! In short: normal. It isn’t a fluke when a girl saves the day, she isn’t a freak of nature. She’s a heroine, the equal of a hero.

Seriously, go read the interview if you haven't. It's not long and you might even like it. Also, I have it on good authority (another awesome author, "Hi Michele") that JDG is super nice. I always love to hear that.

I've talked on and on, ad naseum, about wanting Grace to have positive role models in the books she reads. I've been reading up a storm in preparation for her soon-to-be great love of reading, just in case. I'm collecting books and lists of books like mad -thank you everyone for contributing to that cause.

Back to the quote. "It isn’t a fluke when a girl saves the day, she isn’t a freak of nature. " And this is often the case. When I read about this strong, normal, heroine -she is unusual within her society. She stands out. Is this because a woman such as JDG describes would automatically stand out in a real world or because she needs to stand out as the main character? Which is it, do you think?

I'd like to hope she stands out only because she needs to for the purposes of storytelling.** I like to think that this strong, normal heroine is part of a society that produces women just like her and she is what she is. Am I wrong to hope?

I'm finding more stories to suit this vein of thinking and it's great. Hermione is a start. Miri is another (Princess Academy -it's not Disney, don't get turned off by the title). You can read it in every one of JDG's stories.

So, anyhow, I loved this interview. I'll keep looking for the SIW -strong independent woman (thanks Lauren and Eric for that phrase) in books and real life. But now you know what I think.


*as opposed to black and white (you now, helpless or uber-witchy)
**did you get that, J -I actually used the phrase 'purposes of storytelling' please don't shun me later

Talk To The Hand Smurf Goes Native

I don't know what that means but it amuses me.

On Saturday Grace and I went downtown with Camille and Kgordee for a little shopping adventure amid the football crowd.

At a random jewelry shop, Kgordee found a brain-teaser-type toy and quickly picked it up and solved it. He started to show Grace how it worked and couldn't seem to get it to work as quickly the second time. Finally, Grace lost patience and here is what she said,

"Kgordee, why don't you buy it and take it home and work on it. Send me a letter when you solve it."

And she moved on. Um, ow. Better watch your back, Grace.

Also, should you come to visit between now and election day. Be prepared to answer Grace's questions regarding who you will be voting for. Then be prepared to defend your answer if it's not Obama. I swear we did not put her up to this. (But I must say I am pleased.)

Tagged By Moddy

Because I can't resist answering questions, taking quizzes*, making up answers:

What was I doing 5 years ago?

Working part time as a research dietitian, helping Grace get used to her new daycare, starting to come out of my clothing funk, crushing on Justin.

Pet Peeves
-being cold in the morning when I have to get out of my warm bed
-clothing tags -they feel terrible against my skin
-crusty people
-people who hold grudges -c'mon, forgive and move on, stop with the stink-eye already!

Pet Peeves Related to Reading (yes, really, what?!)
-(stolen from Moddy) when the library doesn't have the book I'm dying to read
-not being able to get the book I want IMMEDIATELY (or faster)
-not owning the book I'm dying to read
-this is an oldy but goody: pictures of people on the covers of the books I'm reading -eww, let me just imagine it

Things I would do if I were a Billionaire**

Don't think I didn't have this planned out years ago. Of course, I was just thinking a million would do.

So, all the usual stuff: houses for me and mine, cars, trips, charitable contributions, personal library to rival that of the one in Beauty and The Beast, trust funds for the kids (there was always the plural in mind).

Moddy hit on a great one: socks. Totally. All the socks.

I think billions is too much to spend. It would have to be spread over a lot of people and we could all come up with our own ways to continue to spread the wealth. Charter schools, literacy programs, etc.

Oh and I would want to fix the next presidential race. Would billions be enough?

Favorite Foods

Always the Mexican

*I think this might be me trying to make up for being such a poor tester in school. Seriously, I can talk myself out of a right answer faster than a speedo-wizard.

**I think the correct answer here is "nothing different, I am perfectly content with my life", but I'm not and therefore I want.

Favorite Conversations

This morning at the bus-stop:

Grace: Mom, yesterday I was a good example to a bee.

Me: ??

Grace: Yep. I just sat still and showed him he didn't have to sting me. Then he went away.

Last night at dinner:

Grace: 'Eeney-meeney' isn't fair any more. It used to be far but now it's not.

Me: ??

Grace: Because look: [goes through 'eeney-meeny'], see it always ends up on the other person. It used to be fair but now it's not. With 'bubble-gum-bubble-gum' at least you can put two feet in. That's fair.

Me: okay.

The Internets Would Like To Welcome Miss Moddy

You can read more here. I'm so glad you've come to play.

In Which MissKitti Profoundly Apologizes To The Universe

I am SO sorry.

Okay, the guilt of not speaking in glowing terms about my calling is killing me. Killing Me!, I say. The shame is too much. I must make amends.

Really, all there is to say is that the children I taught are each lovely in their very own ways. Each possess charms, talents and, abilities that are uniquely their own. When pressed, I say they're elegant. (thank you, Jane Austen)

Each class member I've had is very intelligent and certainly very capable. Whether I could interest them enough to join in the lesson was always variable.We had some good discussions and some mediocre ones and there were some discussions that should have happened that didn't.

No really, lovely children all. And I'm sorry for not saying that to begin with.

In Which MissKitti Returns To The Adult Class

I'm not going to lie, folks. I'm pretty excited to be going back to Relief Society.

I was called to be the RS Secretary on Sunday. Sweet. (I hope.) I have no idea what all that entails. I'm sure it will be great, whatever it is.

For the next little while, I'll be playing double duty until someone is called to replace me as teacher to the ten-year-olds. Everyone assures me this will happen quickly. I hope so -no RS until then.

It's not that I didn't love my calling in the Primary. Or like it, often. The presidency and other teachers are totally great and sweet and very helpful. And I often enjoyed the children. I also really liked singing time.

However, it turns out I don't have a lot in common with ten-year-old boys. Other than books -they gave some really good reading suggestions. Fablehaven, anyone? Artmeis Fowl? (To be fair, Burton and Tracy have been recommending these for years.) Spiderwick. Unfortunately, the Book of Mormon isn't on their list of "must reads".

So, while books other than the BoM can take up a portion of the lesson time, at some point we're going to have to get to the whole point of their being in Sunday School. Yep. And then the sound effects start. And the crawling around and under the chairs. Sometimes the throwing of things. The spontaneous shouting or calling out -not to be confused with speaking in tongues. Sweet boys, all, just still working on impulse and volume control.*

I've started to see my class as cosmic justice. I was not what you would call a quiet and sedate child in my Primary-going years. Oh no. I remember many Sundays having to sit in Grandpa's chair, after church, to practice being reverent.

Quick note on 'grandpa's chair' for the uninitiated: my Grandpa was an amazing carpenter-wood worker. He often built things for his kids and grandkids: beautiful cedar chests, plant stands, roll-top bread boxes (Mom, I really want yours), toy boxes, many things. He made us two oak chairs. Very functional and sturdy and lovely to look at. Also, not especially comfortable if you're a little kid and your legs don't reach the floor and the seat of the chair hits at an awkward spot on the back of your knees. And the backs are hard. People with bad backs love these chairs.

So. If we didn't sit reverently in church -all three hours- we had to sit in Grandpa's chair when we got home. Half-hour, hour, whatever. We learned to be reverent, let me tell you. I think my parents were on to something. Surprisingly enough, I really like those chairs now.

Moving on. I spent a lot of time alternately visiting the Bishop's office (who was my dad for five of those years) and sitting in Grandpa's chair. Which translates, roughly, to me not being a favorite with the teachers in Primary. Bless their little hearts.

Anywho, I'm sure I'll take another (many more) turn(s) in Primary. I'll try harder to be a better teacher. More fun lessons and all that. But for now, WAHOO! I'm going to Relief Society!


*if you're the parent of any of the above, and I don't think you are, don't feel bad. i'm sure my kid is giving her teacher a run for her money at least occassionally. we all raise our kids the best we can and hope they don't torture their teachers. no hard feelings.

Sometimes I Wonder

Are people really only mean because they are insecure? Or are there just mean people who also happen to be insecure?

Because I've met some mean people and they really seemed to think they were awesome. Maybe mean, insecure people are also very good actors.

Someone should study that.

Various and Sundry III

• It turns out that grass tea tastes better with other herbal teas mixed in. So far I have tried: lemon, mandarin orange, orange spice. All greatly improve the flavor of grass. Just so you know.
• 
  
• Cereal, when purchased in small, individual-sized boxes, tastes way better than the same cereal in a larger box.
• At least, they taste better if you're eight and your mean old mom is making you eat some thing for breakfast and the dumb breakfast cookies (yes- breakfast cookies, made by Quaker and they are yummy, with fiber and whole oats) aren't very appealing and she refuses to buy cereal straws because something about "just like candy" and yogurt is not appealing this week. Yeah.
• 
  
• Plus-sized jeans are not just bigger in the waist, as I previously thought. If you get them for a regular sized girl, thinking they will give her a little more room in the waistel region, then you will be wrong. They will be at least a full size too big and look similar to saggy-baggy elephant skin when worn to school.
• And then you'll be kind'a sad that you didn't try them on your daughter two months ago (when they were on sale at gapkids) when you could have just returned them. Sigh. At least she can wear them for the next couple of years.
• 
  
• You should always check under your kids sweaters before they go to school. If not, you might discover, on arriving home at the end of the day, that your child has in fact thrown a sweater over the shirt she wore to bed that she wore under another sweater so that I would not notice that she was wearing the same shirt to bed that she wore to school that day.
  
• For at least the last half of the day she will have taken her sweater off so that everyone will know that her parents let her go to school for two days in a row with the same shirt on. Naturally.
• Apparently, it was very comfortable. And it was from Grandma Natalie. She really likes it. When questioned about this, your child might respond, "What?! Oh, I forgot."
• You might then considering questioning your parenting skills. But don't give into it. You're just making all the other parents feel better that someone else misses things too. And you're making it easier for your kid's teacher to pick your kid out of a crowd. Good times all around.
• 
  
• Would you count the tomato sauce on a slice of Sbarro's pizza as a serving of fruit or vegetable? Because I was leaning toward vegetable but I don't want to anger the fruit party.
• Tomato. Tomahto.
  

Speaking of 19th Century Novels...

Take the Quiz here!

I've always found Elinor Dashwood to be a perfectly lovely woman. And she always looks like E.T., in my mind. Could be because I saw the movie before reading the book.

So. Which Austen heroine are you?

Thanks so much, Erika, for sharing. I love these quizzes.

And Now For An Inflammatory Post

Actually, I meant "anti-inflammatory". But whatever.

Surely I can't be the only one considering aching joints these days. If so, well then move right along. This post is not for you.

The following has to do with dietary practices to help reduce inflammation. Which should help alleviate soreness and joint stiffness. Which would help the (above-) average arthritis suffer to suffer less. Good idea, no?

The Arthritis Foundation puts out a magazine every couple of months that shares arthritis-related studies and research that may be helpful to its readership (that's me). This last installment featured several useful pieces of information, of which I will be sharing two or three with y'all. Good stuff.

Before I begin, let me just state that the information shared is based on scientifically conducted studies by scientists, who are not me, and I do paraphrase. If you'd like real references, please follow the links and then follow those links. You will see the words "may" and "might" because these people are cautious and also because they want to cover their hienders against lawsuits.

Also, please understand that I'm not recommending the replacement of medicines, only the addition of good dietary habits. They can work in tandem. (I would never stop taking my meds. They make me feel good, why would I do that?!)

Now, on to the helpful interesting stuff:

• An apple a day really is good for you. See here:

"Apples also may help fight inflammation. They lower levels of CRP – a marker of inflammation that can spike during a rheumatoid arthritis flare – according to a review of data from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, a government database. And you don’t even have to take the time to slice an apple: Along with those who ate apples, people who ate applesauce or drank apple juice tended to have lower blood pressure and a smaller waistline than those who didn’t consume apples."

• Higher amounts of fiber = better for you:

"Fiber is good for the heart, may prevent some cancers and now appears to lower C-reactive protein (CRP), an indicator of inflammation found in the blood. A high CRP level signals general inflammation and could indicate anything from an infection to rheumatoid arthritis to heart disease."

Also, the tested amount of fiber was 27-28gm/day. Just so you know. Side note: there are many things that amaze and delight me about my mom. One of them happens to be that she is the Fiber Queen. She includes more fiber in her diet (30g for breakfast) than anyone I know. She is Awesome. And she doesn't have arthritis. Coincidence?

• Probiotics = happy digestion. Probiotics being the good bacteria in your digestive tract. Not really inflammatory-related but interesting, nonetheless. I'm always interested in keeping my GI tract happy and healthy.
  

• Green tea: a natural medication? Inquiring minds are working on this one. It looks like including green tea in the diet may help to reduce the effects of RA. How nice would that be? Very. I know how my biologic drugs have helped, which is to say SO MUCH. Having a natural addition to that may very well put me into running marathons. You never know. (Actually I do know -I hate running, even before RA.) Maybe I could do a bike race with Burton. We shall see.

What about the WoW, you may ask? To that I say, indeed. I follow the word of wisdom and I also want to take care of my body. If green tea will improve my body's ability to function, then I will drink it. Methotrexate is a drug used for abortion -I have no qualms taking it. If you have a compelling argument to the contrary please let me know. (I'm not saying it's impossible, I just haven't thought of one I would accept.)

Okay. Now what I want to know is, how soon can I expect to see the benefits of my good habits?. I ate a FiberOne bar for breakfast washed it down w/ a DanActive drinkable yogurt. Then I had a cup of green tea (which tastes like essence of grass -eww). I will be eating two small gala apples with my lunch.

So. I should be running circles around Grace by dinner. Right, guys? Guys?

Things I've Learned in PA II

• Red-up - means to tidy up, to do a quick cleaning before guests arrive. Not to be confused with deep cleaning or Spring cleaning.
• Run the Sweeper -same as to vacuum
  
• Chipped-ham BBQ -traditional food to be eaten while watching a Steelers' game
• Ham Pot Pie -surprisingly is not a pie but whoa, it is good, homemade noodles included
  

Just so you know.

Anyone Can Be President?

I don't accept the notion that having a president you'd want as a bar-buddy is a good idea. If s/he's really intelligent, has a good range of life experiences, great ideas and means to get them done -well, I imagine s/he would be interesting as a dinner companion. And that's great.

However, if our first criteria for president is that s/he be just like (the collective) us -we totally deserve what we get. Which in my mind, is a country at war and a failing economy. Oh wait.

I'd like a president who is willing to talk to my higher instincts rather than "meet me at my level". I'd like the president to see the big picture of our country's needs. I'd also like to know that s/he can get members of both parties to work together for the profit of The People. I'd also like to know that the president can play nice on a global scale.

Given all these high-minded ideas, is there a candidate to satisfy?

A friend of mine, K., gave me an article from the Parade (in the Sunday edition of the paper). The article is written by Doris Kearns Goodwin, entitled, "The Secrets of America's Great Presidents". It's a look at what qualities are important in a president, using Abraham Lincoln and Franklin Roosevelt as examples. It's an excellent article and I would encourage anyone who has access to this week's Parade to look it up.

Just in case you don't get the Sunday paper (I don't), the main points are listed below. An American President should have:

1. The courage to stay strong -A.L.'s rise above poverty, FDR's rise above paralysis
   
2. Self-confidence -both former presidents chose for their cabinets people who disagreed with them politically and vocally, so as to have all sides represented and the best ideas put forward
   
3. An ability to learn from errors -both presidents admitted errors and changed policies as needed
   
4. A willingness to change -see #3
   
5. Emotional intelligence -A.L. "shared successes and shouldered public blame for failures from subordinates"; FDR was able to encourage others to rise to their potential, to do their jobs well
   
6. Self control -A.L. would write "hot letters" when angered by someone else and then set it aside to deal with the issue calmly. He would apologize for offenses given; FDR was noted for his calm under calamity, reasoning over the next steps to be taken
   
7. A popular touch -both presidents made themselves aware of what everyday citizens needed and expected from their governments, they were accessible (as much as possible) to their country-people.
   
8. A moral compass -A.L. refused to give up on emancipation; FDR chose to support England against Hitler; both because they felt it was the right choice
   
9. A capacity to relax -FDR would host a cocktail hour in the evening with a strict no business policy; A.L. was known for his sense of humor and long-winded tales
   
10. A gift for inspiring others -both presidents were able to "convey their convictions with stories and metaphors, as well as a profound sense of history and a love of poetry and drama."

Marvelous, I know. Again, Doris Kearns Goodwin is the author and the whole article is worth reading.

Anywho, I feel inspired to go look closely at both candidates and make a choice.

Yes, I Can

Okay. I've thought long and hard about this. I was never going to touch politics on this blog. (edited to add: that's not entirely true. It was always in the back of my mind. I just didn't think I'd really do it.) However, a line has been crossed and now I'm mad. SO, knowing that the following may or may not jive with your personal view of all things political; read at your own risk.

I wanted to write a post about a person who shall not now be named (rhymes with "tail'in) -I don't want to add to her attention grab. I am sick of her assertions of things that are twisted truths (one might also assert, outright lies).

Perhaps I should give her the benefit of the doubt -ignorance regarding the facts, unfamiliarity with the issues, whatever. Given that this is an election year and she is actually on the freakin' ticket, not so much.*

The aformentioned "twisted truths" are various and sundry statements made regarding Obama, assertions about McCain's character (it's true, there's no love lost there, but still) and her own political leanings. Also, taking earmarked money for something, saying 'no thanks', keeping that money anyway and using it for something else does not equal change or mavrick-ness, or anything other than outright dishonesty and shadiness. I'm just saying.

In an effort to remain more positive (because that's what I do), I shall instead provide for you the facts as they stand on one specific issue: Obama's tax plan. Decide for yourself, but please use correct information.

Obama's Comprehensive Tax Policy Plan for America will:

• Cut taxes for 95 percent of workers and their families with a tax cut of $500 for workers or $1,000 for working couples.
• Provide generous tax cuts for low- and middle-income seniors, homeowners, the uninsured, and families sending a child to college or looking to save and accumulate wealth.
• Eliminate capital gains taxes for small businesses, cut corporate taxes for firms that invest and create jobs in the United States, and provide tax credits to reduce the cost of healthcare and to reward investments in innovation.
• Dramatically simplify taxes by consolidating existing tax credits, eliminating the need for millions of senior citizens to file tax forms, and enabling as many as 40 million middle-class Americans to do their own taxes in less than five minutes without an accountant.

Obama Factsheet
Key Facts about Obama and Taxes
Information courtesy of Jill Gochanour (HarrisburgPAforObama)

Other areas in which I agree with Obama:

• free agency
• individual responsibility to our country
• individual responsibility to our communities (community organizers, anyone?)
  
• belief in the need for real change
• speaking well is not a sign of the devil -it just means you can speak well and have a good command of the English Language (albeit, not necessarily the Queen's English)
  

For any other questions, please seek the following websites:
Obama -granted, if you live in UT, it doesn't really matter who you like, but tell your friends anyway
McCain -I will say this, his menu page should be very stirring to LDS. ("Called To Serve, anyone?")

Also, feel free to email if you feel the need to set me straight.

*and please know that I realize both sides are trying to look better than the other guy. I'm just more inclined toward the other, other guy.

Things I've learned in PA

Did you know that black and red, when worn together, are "ho" colors? Me neither. But now we all know. Be sure to dress accordingly. (Unfortunate, really, because I love pairing red earrings with an all black outfit.) Perhaps I've been sending the wrong message all these years.

Maybe there are loop-holes to this rule. Anyone?

Also, to anyone who has known of this rule and didn't set me straight, "I thought friends never let friends go out looking like a street walker?!" Where's the love?

My Own Personal Ebert and Roper

Alternately titled: I hear voices.

I've been told that we are each our own worst critic. I sincerely hope so. My inner critic is usually pretty brutal. I have to justify and explain my every action -to MYSELF. Except that the voice of my inner critic usually takes the form of characters from the books I read. And many times the male characters. Hmm. What does that say about me? My need for approval from guys? Something terrible, I'm sure. But let's talk about that another time.

Every waking moment of my life (and some times in my dreams) I'm justifying my actions. Answering to the critic in my head, "I did this because...", "I chose that because...". It's tiring and yet it's very hard for me to not do it. The need to explain or offer apologia (correct use?) seems to be a basic component of my make-up. Maybe someone should research that.

I can't really say when I started doing this 24/7. I don't think I always did. Perhaps it started in part because there have always been so many things I've wanted to do or be: a good singer, a dancer, concert pianist, actress, model, rocket scientist, English Lit professor, a super hero (think Wonder Woman -complete with looking hot in hot pants and go-go boots). So Many Things. When the impossibility of most of those things crashed down around me, perhaps I had to think of reasons why.

When a boy I had a crush on didn't notice me -I needed to know why. When someone was mean at school -again, why? And so began my constant search for, and answer to, my own questions. I guess at some point those questions took more of an inward bent. So now I still wonder why people do the things they do (and incidentally experience more outrage and self-righteous indignation when I disagree) but I'm far more critical of my own "what for's".

Which is odd because, as irritating as this is to others, I also think I'm a perfectly nice person and who wouldn't love me. Really. I generally expect that people will like me and they usually do. At the same time, however, I'm always afraid of offending or disappointing. Weird. Conflicted much?

Anywho, back to the inner critic. I have a constant stream of dialog in my head of what I'm doing and why and, more tiring, what I'm NOT doing and why. Doing the dishes but leaving the stove-top messy. Sweeping but not mopping. Straightening but not vacuuming. Getting up early to exercise but not for long enough OR eating the calories I burned off. Wearing make-up or being natural -wanting to be natural but not loving the look. Making Grace's lunch but only including a vegetable rather than both fruit and veg. Passing my classes but just barely. Graduating but with no minor. Ad nauseum.

And then there's the inner critic comparing me to the characters that I read about. Not brave enough, not strong enough, not born in the right era, not not not. But, given that I think I'm great, I'm constantly arguing back. Yes I am, yes I am. I'm always trying to tell myself that I'm okay as I am. What I do, whatever I do, is enough and it's fine.

Sometimes my happy voice wins out and sometimes it doesn't. When it doesn't I tend to want to avoid people. One less voice to answer to. If that makes sense. This is probably another reason why I don't like talking on the phone. (actually, I'm always looking for excuses for that one. I just don't. That's why.)

It's tiring never being alone in my own head.

What do you struggle with?

Chasing The Dragon

Reading a novel is sometimes like sex.

And begin.

In my current world, there are two types of books: books that are satisfying and books that are not. Things were not always thus. It has just recently (read: last year or so) come to be. And due to the aforementioned summary I will also say this: there is only one type of sex: that of the satisfying nature. In case there were any questions. Oh and also, I am promiscuous with my books only. Fidelity in marriage (or whatever the appropriate wording is).

My reading process is as follows:

1. Hear/read of a new book; anticipation starts

2. Search for the book; mounting anticipation and excitement

3. Obtain said book and begin; experience joy of reading and excitement as the plot unfolds and the characters are revealed

4. Halfway through the book, I am feeling (if it is):

a) Very good — twinge of sadness that it’s already half over, slight wish to prolong the inevitable finishing and yet unable to slow down, still happy, still excited

b) not so good — hope that it will get better, desire to start skimming for the good stuff, annoyance at that thought, determination to see it through (which wins out in 75% of the cases)

c) terrible — I’ve been skimming since the second chapter in the hope of finding something redeeming (in which case I would start the book over and re-read — this rarely happens), at the half-way mark and it’s still no good. I skip whole chapters as I’m skimming, in a hurry to get it over with and be done, (Note: I still take credit for having read the book because I at least can discuss what I don’t like about it and technically I have experienced the book, albeit not as the author intended or would have hoped (that’s the authors fault, y’all; s/he should have written a better book)

5. Five pages from the ending:

a) very good books — well, let’s just say I’m torn between HUGE excitement to know how it ends and a tiny bit of sadness and regret that it’s nearly over (which continues to grow the closer I get to the end)

b) Not so good — at this point I know if the books falls into either a) or c)

c) terrible — I’ve already skipped to the last page and read it thoroughly to see if I missed something profound about the plot (unlikely — but I will plan to talk to J about it, just in case he’s read it and can tell me what really happened and what his opinion is. These days he hasn’t read most of what I’m reading because he’s not interested, which means the book really does stink. It used to be that we were more in sync and a good discussion would ensue.) HUGE regret that I’ve wasted time on this book — I can’t actually remember the last time this happened, Maudie Jane or J can you help me out there?

6. Finish the book, YES! So great, revel in the joy of a good book, pause to relive the highlights, consider re-reading it immediately, flip through it for my favorite parts, mull it over for a few days, consider waking J up to talk about it (even if he hasn’t read the book he is all too happy to hear about it and discuss the topics it has brought up. See why I love this man?!)

Most (the good parts) of this process reminds me of something…wait for it…oh yeah…sex.

So, you can see there would be a problem if most of the books I’m reading lately are not satisfying. I’m accustomed to being satisfied.

I read a good, even great book, and still I feel like it shouldn’t be over yet. I’m left wanting. A little part of me dies (or doesn’t, if you’re still with me) inside. (No, I’m kidding, but it made me laugh to write it).

So. Being me and being married to my own personal book guru, I talked to J. Why am I not satisfied with my books?!! (Yes, I totally wailed. And cried a little bit, too. I’m way too invested in my book experience.) Why am I not happy when I finish a book I enjoyed?!

And thus began the conversation in which we talked about brain candy and reader-involvement and depth and great writing. J’s theory, which I agree with, is that I don’t have to invest much in what I read and I’m only getting out of a book what I’m really putting into it.

True. Even books that leave me devastated and sad, if they are well written, will also make me feel satisfied. Like I accomplished something by reading it or learned something or grew.

Good examples of this are: Blindness –devastatingly beautiful
The Brothers K –same
King Lear

Many of the books I’ve chosen this year give me everything I need to know on a platter. I don’t have to search for anything or stretch within my own experience to relate. I finish a book the same person I was when I started. Entertained? Yes. Satisfied? Not so much.

Admittedly, the stretching and learning/growth is not always what I want. Sometimes it’s too much. When we lived in UT, there was a period when I read Schindler’s List, Angela’s Ashes and The Brothers Karamazov all within a short period of time. By the time I started Crime and Punishment I was overwhelmed. Words were exchanged. There were tears (on my part). A book was thrown. Yes, it’s true — don’t judge me — it was a rough couple of months.

After that, the reading of those types of books has been more interspersed with lighter reading. Then, as my life has seemed more complex, sometimes even hard (okay, don’t laugh, but sometimes my life seems hard. Hey –no laughing), brain candy books is about all I can handle. So really, they do serve an important purpose.

The summer that J and G spent in Idaho is a good example. I missed them and didn’t want the complication of heavy reading. Also, I love reading about Regency England and I love a good romance and I found a whole slew of books by the same author to hold me over until my Sweetie came back to me. For decency’s sake I threw in a couple of Jane Austen’s. That way if anyone asked what I had read lately I could tell them without blushing. Oh, and I love Jane Austen. There’s always that.

Side note. Let me tell you what’s embarrassing: covering your book jacket with a homemade paper-bag book cover. Not to protect the binding but to protect yourself from having to see the cover. Yeah. Not a shining moment in my personal history. Also, I hate when books have pictures of people on the cover. I want to decide what the characters look like — not depend on some book-cover-design-artist (sorry if that’s what you do –but listen to the people, just leave the cover blank excepting the title. If a book is good enough, you don’t need to wow the audience with shiny pictures). If I want to see pictures in a book then I will buy a picture book. End rant.

For awhile, I have been able to content myself with what I consider crossover books: young adult and older-children books. Books that have great stories, are well told, books that don’t just tear your guts out and ask you to examine them. However, being as this is a newer area of focus for me, there is a lot of uncovered ground. And sometimes in the covering of ground, one is likely to step in a cow-pie or two. Or maybe just a puddle.

Actually, that makes it sound like I hate the books I’ve been reading. Not so. This is just the resentment talking.

I have gotten so fully away from those books, as previously mentioned, that I didn’t even know where to start. I mean, Jane Austen only wrote six books, Jane Eyre has no sequel and Blindness can only be seen so many times. I know there are many more classics and master authors out there but, again with the over-whelming-ness of it all. Because the other part of the problem is getting my heart in the right place and my mind aligned to something deeper. I have to be Ready.

Which is J’s cue to step in and say, “Why don’t you try…?” Lovely man. Offering me a novel I can get invested in, think about, discuss and love.

And maybe even take to dinner…

The Gracestress Starts Third Grade

That's right, y'all, THIRD GRADE. Once again, the proud parents showcase (can I use that word?) their lovely daughter:


(Special thanks to Kate and Maddie for shrinking their new dress so that Grace might have it. She's a huge fan.)

But first, let us read a book. A little warm up for the big day.

(Thank you, Grandma Natalie!)

All Too Brief and Not Nearly Enough Pictures

Once again, I'm going to start off with apologies and excuses -because that's how we roll around here. What?!

Firstly, I'm very sad to say that I didn't get to see all my friends and lovelies on this trip. Not enough time and I couldn't stop being tired -always. Weird. But, anyhow I wish I could have seen so many more people.

Secondly, I didn't take nearly enough pictures. Upon reviewing my pictures, it turns out I didn't get any of Moddy and missed a lot of cousins. I'm going to take the positive view on this and just be happy I remembered the camera at all -since it's a long standing Holmes' tradition to forget it in the first place.

Now for the pics.

Cafe Rio, post Temple trip:


Meeting the lovely and oh so sweet Natalie (who we LOVE):


Grace and Lo in the sandbox:


Family Dinner(s)*:

*there were actually many more of these pics but as they involve people eating and I want to remain friends with said people they shall remain unseen

Cute Cousins (yes -there are way more cute cousins than I have pictures -I'm working with what I have):



Cute Justin take us to the airport (thanks, Justin):


Suddenly, my font appears bold and large. I don't know why and can't fix it. Just know that I'm not, in fact, shouting or trying for the dramatic. No special emphasis intended (that I know of -perhaps my computer knows something I don't?).

Playing Make-Believe

On the Farm:


At the Grocer:


Making the News:


Building Stuff:


Picnicking: Theatrics:


Going Places:


Thanks to the SLC Children's Museum (and, of course, Michele and Regan) for a delightful day.