I've been thinking about the word "soul-mate" lately. What does it mean exactly? Why do people use it? Who cares anyway? (No, wait, did I say that out loud?) I don't really care for the use of that word. What I mean is, it's just a title, something to call somone you really love, a word. I feel like it gets thrown around a lot these days.
Possibly in a previous life (coughhighschoolcough) I had one too many DTR's (define the relationship) and now even the idea of relationship-defining words gives me the shudders. However, I tend to think of Justin and I as just "us". We're together and we like each other and thats good. Why complicate things with descriptors and names for things that really just mean you plan to be together until always. No need to go all Saturday's Warriors.
Still, what is a soul-mate? I don't know. Moving right along...
As a Beehive, then MiaMaid and then Laurel, I made lists and revised lists of what I wanted my future husband to be: faithful, good, something about Moroni, wicked funny, something else. (Should I mention I didn't date much in high school?) All good things. And I totally believe that two good people can totally make a relationship work. However, there were a few important things that I left off my list.
In the spirit of love and V-Day and togetherness and making more lists, here are some other things that should have been on my list.
The List...
( of Things I Love About Justin...*)
- He doesn't judge me -I am how I am and that's great with him (ie, I talk back to poorly-done commercials, I put carrots on his plate whether he asks for me or not, I read crappy books and he's just happy for me to have books that I like reading)
- Appreciates my passions/ambitions even if they're not his
- Gives me space and "me" time
- Rock Star Hair (need I say more)
- Encourages a safe environment for questions and discussions (willing to explain anything to Grace -oh yeah- guess who was there, right beside me for The Talk, at age 6, when she REALLY wanted to know how things work)
- Feels strongly about equal rights
- Not intimidated by strong women (or strong daughters)
- Willing to not give up when life sucks (and sometimes it does, so don't argue with me)
- Can teach and be taught
What about you? What's on your Soul-Mate List?
2 comments:
Okay I totally love this post, I think the soul mate thing is crap too, in fact I love that Kgordee and I chose to be together and because of that we make it work. There was no destiny, no written in the stars, just our desire to love each other and be loved by the other.
I totally made those lists too, I am pretty sure I got that from you. It's funny now to think about what I thought was important, some of it was so right and some was so lame. Who needs lists anyway when I married Mr. "How could he be anymore prefect for me, but he always find a way to surprise me with more perfect".
I guess the perfect part comes out especially when things aren't so perfect in life and he is there in just the ways that I need him.
You don't believe in soul-mates. haven't you ever seen Saturday's Warriors??? How could you question that someday you'll see someone and you'll start singing the same song!
No seriously, I think that marriage is what you make of it. You and your spouse have to work to make it a good marriage, like mom and dad say they still have to work at it everyday.
I totally made the lists of what I wanted in Mr. Right. But after dating some real turds I refined and shorted my list to the really important things: like tall, dark & handsome, and I think that the end results turned out pretty good. I love that while we can't read each other's thoughts that for the most part we are on the same page. But most of all I love, love that he is such a great dad.
Post a Comment